Tuesday, 4 August 2009

you say it best when you say nothing at all

Change is constant

Stop spouting this in knee-jerk fashion. Instead, carry a homemade coin in your pocket which says 'Change is constant' on one side and 'The more things change the more they stay the same' on the reverse. When a opportunity to say something about change comes up, pull out the coin (surreptitiously, of course) and work out to which of those hackneyed one-liners the situation applies. By the time you reach a conclusion your opportunity to speak may well have passed thereby allowing you to avoid the arrows of error under the aegis of Lady Luck herself, while simultaneously basking in something akin to true wisdom complete with pensive visage.

Keep your friends close but keep your enemies closer

You're aiming for deep or cool. Stop it. I can imagine Machiavelli whispering this in the ear of upper echelon corporate types, drug barons, prime ministers and kings. But let's be real, the closest you've come to anything resembling the game of thrones is castle kingside in a game of chess - if that. Seriously. Abort.

I don't hate anyone

I really don't know why I've been hearing this so often. Perhaps it's from some popular self help book that I can't be bothered to read. Might be true that you don't hate anyone but let's be clear, it's a matter of circumstance not a matter of will. Think you could mount that high horse as an inmate of a concentration camp? Hate is an emotion and unless you're Buddha (or any similar top-kick spiritual entity of your choice) you're at the mercy of it with the rest of us. How you act on that hate? Well, that's another story.